Some definitions

EXTIRPATE

Verb applied only to heresies and corns.

FACE

The mirror of the soul. So some people must have very ugly souls.

INSTRUMENT

If it has been used to commit a crime, it is always “blunt,” unless it happens to be sharp.

LIGHT

Always say: “fiat lux” when a candle is lighted.

TOYS

Should always be educational.

—Gustave Flaubert, “The Dictionary of Received Ideas,” ed. and trans. by Robert Baldick and A.J. Krailsheimer