Via Robot Wisdom auxiliary, Jerry V. Haines is developing the World’s Least Helpful Phonetic Alphabet. I am reminded of a venerable Mike Nichols and Elaine May routine from the early sixties that my mother and I listened to incessantly on LP. Mike is running very late for a very important appointment, and is trying to get the phone number of George Kaplan, his meeting contact, from Information (what became known as Directory Assistance, because people kept using 411 as the public library). Elaine, the operator on the other end of the line, clearly needs to get out more. She repeats back the name he’s looking for:
That is Kaplan, George Kaplan. That is K as in Knight, A as in Aardvark, P as in Pneumonia, L as in Luscious, A as in Aardvark again, N as in Newelpost?